HELPFUL HINTS FOR THOSE ASPIRING TO BE REAL BARKING MOONBATS

It's quite simple, really. Just follow the rules.

Rule one: There are no rules.

Rule two: There is a rule that to be a BARKING Moonbat, you must take the high road and cite a bit of metaphysics in a website posting. Make sure it contains some convoluted scientific, but unprovable, theory so everyone can jump up and down and try to catch you in the tied-together legs of their pajama bottoms.

Rule three: You must break the most important rule which is to pay absolutely NO attention to Sun Turkeys and other strays, no matter how much they annoy, irritate, misrepresent, insult, flame, defame, use logical circles to "defend" their lack of a point or meaning or generally mouth-off in a meaningless and unclear manner.

aside: Other categories of offensive behaviour will also accepted as criteria for "blanking" invading low flyers -- with the anticipated due process entailed.

Remember: not all turkeys are turkeys no matter how low they fly.

Rule Four: You cannot attain BARKING Moonbathood by posting pictures of bats. You must be a certifiable BARKING Moonbat. You cannot claim to have gotten over attaining enlightenment to qualify; you must have already forgotten there was ever such a goal.

Rule Five: You must be really, REALLY irritated by those who waste their intelligence as well as their time.

Rule Six: While you may possess an actual physical body (and what bat, BARKING or otherwise, does not), your sonar and sailing must be confined to such satanic pursuits as problem solving, analysis, self actualization, mutation and progation of the species and true affirmation of one's BARKINGhood.

Rule Seven: It is imperative that your ideological bent of wing should have a gigantic label slapped to it, in DAY GLO paint, clearly visible at all times of night, stating that you are at least one of the following: a perverted progressive, liberal, Libertarian, socialist or commie, and far worse, that you can read an essay IN CONTEXT.

Rule Eight: Light refreshments are to be served in a juvenile, I mean, a jovial manner.

Rules of the Road: If you can't BARK loud enough, please find a designated overhang. Crashing BARKING Moonbats in mid air will not be tolerated.

When the going gets tough, the tough get BARKING mad.

If you can BARK loud enuf, please feel free to post additional requirements. No medals will be awarded for courage if you keep your fangs to yourselves.